Hebrews 13:2 “ Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.”
I have led a very unique life, which at 50+ years old, I am able to look back on and see from the beginning was planned just for me. Nobody else could accomplish what my Heavenly Father had planned for me, just as nobody else can accomplish His purposes that He has for your life.
I’m sure that if I had been given a choice for my life, I would have changed a few things, but now with hindsight I can look back and see the tapestry that only He could have created. One hint that He did give me, that most never receive, was a supernatural encounter when I was 4 years old, that foretold the type of life that I would endure. This encounter solidified my faith, before I even knew what faith was.
I have extremely vivid memories of even my earliest childhood days. My mother is still alive and often marvels at the details that I remember, even at 1-2 years old. I was a strong willed and intelligent child, but not one that was very creative. I didn’t have imaginary friends or occupy my time with creative outlets like art, music, etc. That all bored me. Instead I was an active, athletic child, who preferred to be playing outside or being with friends.
So when the event in the Winter of my 4th year occurred, it was very strange indeed to my mother and grandmother, who both witnessed it as it happened and would tell others what they saw.
My father was a Green Beret and we were always moving around, but whenever he had a chance for leave, we would visit his family in West Virginia or Mom’s family in Georgia. That Christmas when I was 4, it was his family’s turn and we spent the Holidays with my Grandparents in WVa.
It was a fun, white Christmas and my Aunt and Uncle with their 2 young children were with us as well. I remember not being able to go to sleep Christmas night, in the trailer that my Grandparents lived in, because I couldn’t figure out how Santa would get in, if they didn’t have a chimney.
It was during this trip that my “Guardian Angel” introduced himself to me. My Mom and Grandmother had taken me with them to the fabric store in town, but I got extremely bored so asked if I could stay outside in the snow. It was late afternoon and being a small town, there was never a fear of something harmful happening to me, but my mom insisted that I stay right in front of the door so she could keep an eye on me.
I was sitting on a small half wall that bordered the walkway, when an old man came and sat beside me. I can picture him perfectly right now, with an “old man hat” fedora, a plaid overcoat and a book in his hand. His first words to me were “Hi Shay, how are you doing today?” I looked at him and asked him “How do you know my name?”
He replied “Well, I’m your guardian Angel and I’ve come to tell you something very important. You’re going to have a very hard life but I want you to know that I will always be with you. You won’t be able to see me, but you will always be comforted by knowing that I’m right there. You will never be truly alone.”
He wrapped his arm around me and then he was just gone. I wasn’t scared at all. I was warm and loved and comforted.
During this time my mom and grandmother were both wondering what I was doing, because they were watching me talking by myself. When they came out they questioned me and I told them what had happened. They were both shocked because there was nobody with me, yet I was not a child who would make up a story like this. Another shocking aspect was, at that point, we were not going to any Churches. My parents weren’t practicing any faith at that point, so I had never heard of Guardian Angels.
It wasn’t until later the next year, that we would move to California and my parents would get caught up in the Jesus Movement Revival of the early to mid 1970’s. We attended Calvary Chapel Riverside and Greg Laurie was the pastor who prayed with me for salvation.
My parents enrolled me in a small Christian Kindergarten program and then, at 6 years old, my “hard life” of suffering began. I developed encephalitis and became extremely ill. My parents were told that I likely wouldn’t survive and if I did, I would be a “vegetable” the rest of my life because my brain had swelled so much. I wasn’t afraid though. I could imagine my Angel with me at all times.
Miraculously God allowed me to recovery, with a better than just functional brain. Unfortunately though, that illness would have lasting implications that would follow me the rest of my life, although science wouldn’t put that together for 4 decades.
I would deal with “random” medical issues for the rest of my life, causing all kinds of pain and heartaches, but I was in great physical health, when I wasn’t deathly ill. Between mysterious issues, I was very healthy and athletic. That made my medical journey that much more confusing and added to the emotional suffering, because I felt crazy when doctors couldn’t figure anything out.
My “hard life” wasn’t only physical suffering though. It was filled with emotional suffering as well. Because my family moved so much, I attended 13 different schools. In making so many friends, in so many different places, by the time I was 18 years old, I had had 9 friends die. Grief was a big part of my life from very young. Not just the old people that we expect to lose but people my age.
When I was 17, I was attending another Christian School when I got pregnant. I decided to carry the pregnancy but I was asked to not only leave the school, but to leave the Church as well. I was told that the younger kids looked up to me and I was a poor example.
A few months later I miscarried that baby, a boy, at 18 weeks but I wouldn’t go back to a church for 7 years. I never lost my faith in God but my faith in His people was shattered, and not for the last time.
I married my husband when I was 19 and a year later I got pregnant with our first child Robby. Unfortunately, my “random” illnesses got in the way and he had to be delivered at 25 weeks because I developed eclampsia. He was 1lb 12oz and at a couple of weeks old he developed a brain injury.
The next 2 1/2 years were full of suffering and many deep, hard spiritual questions but I never questioned my underlying faith in my Heavenly Father. I also always KNEW my Angel was with me, every step of the way.
In the 3 years after Robby’s birth, we experienced loss after loss. It started with the loss of my husband’s brother, then my grandmother, grandfather, then Robby. Lastly my parents marriage fell apart, which was just one more grief.
However, throughout my suffering, God would still give me Supernatural experiences that most people will never have. I know that they were allowed in my life to help balance the pain.
My next major event happened 2 months after Robby died. My husband’s work sent us on a trip to Hawaii, to try to help with our grief. Not only had we lost our child, we had also been told that I should never get pregnant again because of how close I came to death. Doctors warned that the baby would be in great danger and that I would have a high risk of death or being on dialysis the rest of my life, so we were not only grieving the loss of our only child but we were grieving the loss of the idea that we would have a family at all.
One day we were sitting by the pool at the Hilton Hawaiian Village, when I saw a woman with her baby by the pool. I was so filled with grief that I ran to the bathroom by the beach, weeping. Two women walked in and saw me. They were not staying at the hotel but had just walked in from the beach to use the restroom. They were also tourists and best friends. One was black and her name was Angela, and the other was a tall blonde woman who was also named Angela.
They immediately came over to me and wrapped their arms around me and started to pray the most powerful prayer I’ve ever experienced to this day. The first Angela then looked at me and said “Your Heavenly Father wants you to know that He is going to double the portion that’s been taken from you and you are going to have two children, a boy and a girl.”
Well, at that moment I just thanked them and thought that maybe Steve and I would adopt or something, but we would have a family. I took them with me over to meet Steve and then they walked away. I very quickly turned around because I wanted to get their contact information but they were just gone. No sight of them anywhere.
After we returned home, my Granddaddy passed away. One more tragic loss. When we went to the funeral, I was telling my cousins the story about my visitors in the bathroom, when one cousin said “Shay… Duh…. Those were Angels! Angela and Angela?” I had honestly not even allowed that thought to cross my mind!
I said to him, “The definition of an Angel is a messenger from God, so, IF IT COMES TO PASS, I will know that they were Angels!“ One year later I was pregnant with my second son, who was born healthy. A year and a half later I had my daughter, who unfortunately was also brain injured shortly after birth.
The battle of another grief was piling on, but at that point I was stronger. Her brain injury wasn’t nearly as bad as Robby’s had been and I was ready to fight for her like I did for him!
When she was 11 months old, she still couldn’t sit supported in a cushion used to help babies sit up. She also rarely smiled at all and wasn’t reaching most milestones that doctors judge development by. I knew that she was brain injured but it had to be documented for her to get the therapies that she needed.
So, I made an appointment at the Early Intervention Program (EIP) for them to do a full neurological exam. Before the appointment, as I was praying, God spoke to me and said “I’m going to heal your daughter, to heal your heart over your son.” I didn’t say anything to anyone because I wasn’t certain it wasn’t just my emotions and I was also accepting of whatever His will was. I had prayed for Robby to be healed and that wasn’t God’s will, so I would just move forward with the exams and take things as they came.
The EIP appt was on a Thursday, downtown, and the Specialist tested her for 2 hours. Afterwards she was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy, lower extremity involvement and borderline Autism (although she was too young for a full diagnosis, because of her lack of interaction it was documented). After we got home, Steve and I cried and processed what our daughter’s life would look like. I was up for the fight of our lives again and at least we knew what therapies to use for her.
The next morning I was woken up by Steve yelling for me to get in her room. He had walked in because he heard her laughing (which she’d never done) and she was STANDING in the crib, bouncing up and down! She had been healed! To verify this I called EIP and said “I don’t want you to think I’m crazy but God healed my daughter and I’d like for you to test her again.” They scheduled another appointment for the crazy lady on the following Tuesday.
When we arrived, the same specialist ran the same tests, for two hours. After she completed them, she said to me “I’ve been doing this for 27 years and I’ve never seen this before. She was disabled last week and she’s not disabled this week… BUT, I don’t think God would heal your child and not heal all of these other children! I’m going to write a second report and let the doctors figure out what happened to her.”
I then said to her “I think that’s why God brought me to you. Let me tell you about my son.” I proceeded to tell her about his brain injury and death. Then I said “I don’t know why God chose to heal her in this life and not Robby. Same parents, same faith, same everything. BUT I do know that Robby was healed when he died and I will rejoice in both of my children. God knows why.”
I refused to use her healing as a show piece though. It would never be fare to her growing up, to force that attention on her. I considered this a private, personal gift to me. And to her of course, but she would never know or understand what her life could have been, like I did. Her life has been one of a healthy, active person. She’s probably the kindest person I’ve ever known and so smart! No one would ever guess that she could have had that diagnosis.
It was only when she was an adult and gave me her permission, did I share it with anyone who wasn’t there at the time. Her doctor always called her her miracle baby though.
So you see, yes, my life has been full of suffering but it’s also been full of the miraculous. There are many more stories. Sometimes it feels like I’ve lived a movie, like the movie “Big Fish”, but it has all happened in my life.
God prepared me from the beginning by sending me an Angel, and He’s sustained me through it all by showing me the miraculous that most never get to see.
He created me to be the only me, who could do only what I could do. Just as He created each of you to be the only you. He has a purpose for everything that you have been through. He knows the end from the beginning already. We only have to trust in His love for us and His goodness. This life is “but a vapor” and then we have eternity.
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