I remember when I was younger, before Social Media, I made an observation that made me really think about offenses. I had 2 friends and each one would literally say the exact same things, and with one, everyone would laugh, but with the other, everyone would get offended.
It wasn’t the words that came out of their mouths that made the difference. It was the perception of the listener, to the condition of the speaker’s heart and intent. It had to do with the speaker’s reputation as well as the words that were said.
The problem with Social media is that people often don’t know each other personally anymore, so the reactions to people’s comments aren’t filtered through the lens of a another person’s reputation, therefore there is always going to be someone who is critical and gets offended.
At that point, a person’s reaction often says more about their character than the writer’s.
If you find yourself getting offended and feeling the need to correct other people’s words, maybe take at a look at your own filter? Are you assuming the worst of someone else? Have you been wounded by something in your past that makes you overly sensitive, when the other person has no idea of your experiences or your expectations of them?
Something may be intended to be completely harmless, or funny, but maybe, because you don’t understand that person’s intent, you’ve jumped to your own conclusions, looking through your lens.
It’s one thing, when you know the other person in real life, or their reputation of writing hurtful things. That’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the people that you don’t really know.
When people get offended by something that I write, I really try to dig deep and be self aware of what I might have said that was wrong. However, after I’ve done that, and I’m honest with myself about what my intentions were, sometimes I just have to let it go, and realize that it probably wasn’t what I said, but the filter of the other person’s perceptions. Over time, it’s usually the same people that do this to me, and I see them doing it to other people as well.
We live in a society where offense is now the first response by many people, instead of understanding, and peace. We are much more bold behind a keyboard than we ever were in real life, before Social Media.
Social Media can be used for great purposes, like support groups, and places to meet others with the same hobbies, etc. but how well do we really know each other anymore?
Try your hardest to be kind all the time, so you build a good reputation, but also don’t be too hard on yourself just because someone else gets offended by something.
It’s often their own issues, not yours. Especially when you typically don’t get offended responses from most of your friends, and the offense typically comes from the same people most of the time.
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